Heartbreak.

Hey friends and family,

First of all, I apologize that so many of you should be hearing this from Nick or I firsthand, but we are just overwhelmed and heartbroken and this seemed like the best way to communicate our news to everyone we love and who has been so faithfully praying for us.

Last night around 12:30am, we got a call in our room from the NICU and they asked Nick to come check on Oliver and get an update on him. By the time he got there, they were doing chest compressions and it was only a matter of minutes before our sweet baby was at home with Jesus. We are crushed and heartbroken, but we are so thankful that we know this isn't the end. We take comfort in knowing that sweet Oliver is with the Lord and didn't suffer long before he got his angel wings, but we weep knowing that this is not how it ought to be.

We got to spend the whole night with him and both sets of grandparents were able to come hold him and say goodbye as well. We are so thankful that Jeremiah got to meet all of the babies last night and we have talked with the social worker several times this morning to come up with a plan on how to tell him and help him grieve. We plan to do that this afternoon. After that, they will take Oliver for an autopsy to see if they can identify the cause of his passing. They believe it has to do with his lungs, but because it all happened so quickly, there's no way to know until they can look at him further. We absolutely know they did everything they could to save our baby, so we are at peace with not knowing the ultimate cause of death, but if this will help them be able to save another baby down the line, we will gladly let them take a look.

Thank you for all of the well-wishes and congratulations yesterday. We rejoice that three of our babies are still here and doing well, and praise God that we got to know and love sweet Oliver for the 10 hours we had with him. They were far too short, but we are comforted in knowing we will see him again.

Please continue to pray for us as we navigate funeral arrangements for Oliver while we still want to care for, get to know, and bond with his siblings. Our hearts are heavy, and we are feeling overwhelmed by it all, but we know the God of love and we know that by his grace, we will eventually all be ok.